The youthful striker is the only bright spot in the lacklustre Red Devils season, and his cheeky attitude makes him an ideal match for Theatre of Dreams.

Upon arriving for his post-match interview, Rasmus Højlund was inevitably confronted with the same question. Was his second goal against Luton a planned deflection of the chest? His response was unequivocal.

“A hundred percent,” he declared. “Just slide it in.”

The young Danish player summed up in eight words what it means to be a Manchester United player and what the team expects from the Theatre of Dreams: they expect just that. Theatre. That’s what it takes to play for United; they want collars turned up, shirts untucked, and thumbs pointing to the nаme on the back of the jersey.

And throughout the past ten years, the Red Devils have lost that diabolical streak. Manchester United slipped deeper than most into the sickness of earnest discourse and detached analysis that has long plagued modern sport, as we have been seduced by possession figures and VAR lines.

Between Sir Alex Ferguson’s directive to Old Trafford to support his chosen successor David Moyes and Erik ten Hag’s fixation on outward demonstrations of discipline, United lost the characteristics that defined their identity as a team and helped them rebuild following the Munich disаster.

David Beckham’s goals from the halfway line, Cristiano Ronaldo’s everything, George Best’s long hair and baggy clothes, and Cantona’s half-turns and chipped finishes to relish in the praise all gave something more. United did more than merely produce football players. They created mischievous gods and were constantly trying to irritate rivals with creative flourishes. They were adored by fans. Mostly because they were absent, rivals detested them. Those were wonderful times.

However, United lost their sense of humour and anarchy. Worse, the carefree attitude was swapped out for one solemn eulogy after another, all delivered in Gary Neville’s snort-y Mancunian accent. Manchester United is this. This is not how Manchester United players should play. These athletes are not members of Manchester United.

Højlund, though, plays for Manchester United. Even if ten Hag fails to achieve any further success, such as finishing outside the top four and winning no trophies this season, the manager has still given the team a player deserving of United’s legendary swagger.

Similar to Best, Cantona, Ronaldo, and Cantona, Højlund is a sly finisher. Both his response to the claim that the goal was inadvertent and his chested finish against Luton Town were perfect examples of sheer instinct and improvisation, characteristics of a great Theatre of Dreams performer. He meant it. He did, of course. And like Best, Ronaldo, and Cantona, he would have lied even if he hadn’t. Even though he is only 21, he can’t help but be impolite. Considering the importance of the club and the incompetence of those around him, his confidence is astounding as well.

The youngest player to score in six consecutive games

Højlund broke Joe Willock’s previous record of 21 years and 272 days when he scored twice against Luton, becoming the youngest player in English Premier League history to score in six consecutive games at 21 years and 14 days. He defeated Erling Haaland, Thierry Henry, and Ruud van Nistelrooy. Subsequently, he strolled up in his slippers for the post-match interview, finding it difficult to comprehend the commotion. He is an оffensive player. He makes a living by scoring goals. Why is this such a big deal? He expressed the same opinions as Ronaldo and Cantona once more, and yeah, we are now seriously bordering on hyperbole.

However, the purpose of these comparisons is to highlight the frequency with which United has practically put their fans to sleep with visually uninteresting performances. Furthermore, the recuperation process isn’t finished. Harry Maguire and Casemiro’s substitutions at halftime served as a reminder of the remaining tasks.

However, Højlund does present a sincere hope. He broke his duck on Boxing Day and hasn’t stopped since, taking 15 EPL games to score. Prior to that, former strikers Gary Lineker and Alan Shearer saw the characteristics of an innate marksman: a willingness to run in behind opponents, a rιsk-taking mentality, and most importantly, a never-dropping head. These days, at Manchester United, who else could sаy that?

Not Alejandro Garnacho, Bruno Fernandes, or Marcus Rashford, three players with undeniable skill who have occasionally faltered in the broken machine. However, they all gave Højlund outstanding service against Luton. The child was served by the senior pros, following a United tactic that used to work rather well for van Nistelrooy.

Højlund ought to have given the ball to Luton, but outstanding goalkeeping kept him from tying the score or steаling the show. It won’t bother him. The real thespians of United never do. The young Dane seems to be no different from the rest; they seem to thrive on it.

The killjoys must, of course, interject now to point out the glaringly obvious. It’s Luton, guys. Ross Barkley’s late header absolutely ought to have won the game, and the defence still has holes in it. which are all accurate, yet these critiques merely make use of contemporary preconceptions. Documenting life at United is often so sombre and funereal.

Højlund provides a little break from the endless cycle of gloom. After scoring two goals last night—his second was a very cheeky effort—this arrogant young man walked over to speak with a few former Premier League players, acting as like he owned the place before leaving with a record-breаking amount of goals. He seems unfazed. He appeared to fit in.

Manchester United has been actively supporting the local children who come through its academy in an effort to emulate the spirit of the Class of ’92. Ironically, though, Højlund is the one who most resembles one of them.